A lot of couples will say that finances are a major stressor in their relationship, and to that I say “finances in general or the way you communicate about finances?” This question usually gives couples pause because the arguing over finances has occurred for so long that they are unable to distinguish between the two.
Financial decisions as a couple is something, surprisingly, many couples do not talk about. I’m not talking about who is going to pay the rent/mortgage or the light bill this month. I’m talking about what amount on a price tag requires a conversation before buying or discussions about future financial goals like what retirement will look like or how was money handled in your family. These are conversations that many do not have when entering or continuing a serious relationship, which leads to future disagreements.
A study published in the Journal of Socio-Economics in 2003 found that when asked separately, husbands and wives have different views about their family’s income and wealth because husbands usually report assets than liabilities and wives vice versa. If you and your partner are having frequent arguments about money, ask yourself this: have you talked about spending habits and the emotions behind them? Have you talked about the meaning of wealth?
If you haven’t, think about why that is. If you have, think about if those values may have changed. If you believe you need help navigating financial conversations, schedule an appointment!