Recently, I was watching a video on mindfulness in which Oprah interviewed Jon Kabat-Zinn, creator of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction. I was struck by his statement, “there’s more right with you, than there is wrong with you.” How often do we beat ourselves up for something outside of our control? How about those times we’re a little too critical of ourselves for simply being human?
I know I’m guilty of doing it. This got me thinking, there really are a lot of things going right in our day; it’s all a matter of what we pay attention to. As a narrative therapist, I think of this as deciding which part of my story I want to focus on. In other words, when you are asked for the umpteenth time to introduce yourself, which parts of your history are you shining a light on? Work is a necessity in order to make a living, but it’s not the entirety of who you are. There may be strengths, interests, and even experiences that you’ve forgotten you had in favor of a narrative that gets reinforced by negative thoughts, feelings, and physical pain or discomfort.
When we remember to give ourselves a little room to be human, we are able to see indefinite possibilities and choose not to be defined by parts of our stories that no longer suit us.
Do you need help rewriting your story? Let’s work together.